Of my post-Eraserheads' concert account.

And I thought I’d be going home with a happy heart…

Wow. It was an eventful day earlier. As thousands and thousands of fans have their high hopes in watching that E-heads concert. I even made some crappy video blogging but I opt not to continue with that. Well, mainly because it was really an uneventful experience.

If you believe in superstitions and omens then I wished that the band followed what the stars are telling them. It all started with that free concert by Marlboro. DOH stopped the concert just merely days before the concert and then the death of Ely’s mom just two days before the concert. It ended up with Ely being rushed to the hospital just after the last song of the first set (was it really the last song?) Bad weather even hello’d but a star said hi.

Well, there’s no turning back and everybody expects the concert to push through.

As the band played their first song, a tear passed by my cheek and felt that all the people in that concert had their dreams come true even for one night. Hey, we all waited for ten years. So, it really is worth the wait.

And then the real uneventful event happened. Just after the first set, a twenty minute signage went on again and all of us waited for the twenty minute break to finish. Twenty minutes passed and there were no ‘heads on the stage. I’m not sure of the actual time but the group went out (minus Ely) with Ely’s sister and told everyone that the concert has to end because Ely was rushed to the hospital. As Ely’s sister stated, due to the physical and emotional stress that he is experiencing, it could’ve affected his health.

*groan*

I’m not sure about this but I believe Ely’s fine. There’s no news yet if part of the tickets would be refunded.

Everyone got home speechless and un-amused with what happened.

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Of course, after the concert, people will be asking some questions. If it was all drama or if the band wanted a dramatic ending to the concert or if the money they got, in comparison with Marlboro’s rate, was halved. I even have a question too, why didn’t they just continue with the concert without Ely? I mean, the entire band members sing? Is it just some respect to their fallen colleague?

Crap. This will really go down in history and I was part of it.

Did that bottle of beer do the trick? No. I’m still waiting for Magasin, Torpedo, and Ang Huling El Bimbo.

However, let’s give everyone the benefit of the doubt for the meantime. Let’s end this concert with a high note na lang. Life is short to sour grape. Let’s remember the part where they were all there in the stage and everyone sang their hearts out. Let’s remember the part where there were no alcoholic drinks in the event and instead sold us energy drinks. And let us always remember that this concert didn’t give us mosh pits and instead gave us the echoing shout of the crowd “GROUP HUG!”

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And I do hope Third Eye Blind will end my thirst for music with a bang. See you guys on September five.

And can somebody please tell me who texted me with With A Smile and Huwag Mo Nang Itanong? (kiss kita. Pramis.)

Of I really don't know what's wrong with me.

Aaaahhh… August. August. August.

This is a hardcore month for me. Really. It is hardcore in a sense that I’ve experienced most of the things this month in a “new” experience.

And here are the firsts this month…

I bought MAD magazine this month with my own hard-earned moolah.

I cried while watching a documentary movie (it’s Sicko and don’t ask me why).

The Goonies is my most watched movie.

I shouldered one of our hardcore utilities.

I read a lot of books this month too.

I was able to catch an arts and music festival.

…and probably my first hardcore concert this month.

Now, I’m not exactly proud of this one but just this month I was able to catch three pinoy movies, not in dibidi, but in a cinema house. Actually I’m not really sure with the first one but I still feel that I’ve seen that movie this month. The three movies are A Very Special Love, Dobol Trobol, and For the First Time (I do hope you’re already expecting this one).

In my defense, I really enjoyed AVSL and DT somehow but FTFT… Uhm… Here goes.

I really don’t know why the movie was great. The girl beside me said something like “ang ganda ng movie no?” Yeah, the movie rocked and you kept saying Greee was “maganda” or “ang ganda noh?” for some umpteenth times. Maybe she stopped way after the middle part of the movie. And that was the time when the shots were back here in Manila.

As I’ve said, seriously this time, that the movie sucked big time (yes, this is veeerrryyy subjective). The script went nowhere from somewhere to whatever. A lot of scenes were hanging. The dialogue was soooo… I really can’t express it but it was more of something between oh my god and some eyes rolling. The delivery was there but it lacked umpfh. And the set-up of the two main protagonists regarding their relationship was so un-romantic comedy-ish. I really felt the pain man.

Just a follow-up, you made the lead actors as conceited persons. That is soooo wrong.

KC wasn’t that good but she wasn’t that bad either. Sadly, I didn’t feel her pain. I only felt the pain of the three ladies that hit my feet, my chair and my arms (no biggie though, I was expecting this). I don’t know binibining Bernal; you got the wrong lead actress this time. And Richard, well he’s Richard. He doesn’t need bashing… Hehehe.

Philip Salvador was out of place (he had some hardcore drama scenes with KC and uhm… yeah) and that includes the entire supporting cast even if they had dialogues except for KC’s brother.

And probably I’d watch this kind of movie ala AVSL. I’ll watch it a week after. Alone. I really can’t watch something with people beside me who kept eating. It was like the person at my left will eat for the whole Greece scene (and at the same time the person at the right kept saying “ganda”) and after that the person at the right will eat.

Can they just eat marshmallow instead? (Well, I’d still want to watch the movie somehow. I paid for it, for God’s sake).

And how about the soundtrack? Bwahahaha. They really over-used the theme song.

Of course, there are some little positive things that I can say for the movie. Candy Pangilinan and the other guy (Benjo was the character’s name) are awesome. Sadly, they had their scenes only during the Greece part of the movie. After that… pfft.

Greece. Wow. Really. I wub Greece.

And that’s it. I made my penance I can take the communion na.

Of some sick humour.

I think I’m tired of some fantasy wherein we dream of being part of a movie in a sense that we’re part of the good guys like Harry Potter for example. All of a sudden we wanted to be a wizard or a witch. Or some adventure film like Indiana Jones. I know that when I was young and I’ve seen Indiana Jones, all of a sudden I want to be like him. I want to experience the thrill of some kick-ass adventure. I want to say to myself that just five years ago I’ve been in an awesome adventure where we fought cannibalistic locales and found a treasure that made my life changed since.

Or maybe a fantasy of the movie of The Girl Next Door where I as a geek or nerd or wuss want to feel what Emile Hirsch experienced. I want to say to our grandchildren that I did some uberly crazy thing when I was young. And I can proudly say that I consider that experience as a good memory. Crazy and good, that’s a good combination.

In short, movies really affects our life greatly whether we like or not (well, this wouldn’t work if we are living in the nineteenth century but it is just plain common sense regarding that. And I have no bitching remarks about this. Now, this is something new). Movies with themes whether they are love stories, sci-fi fantasies, kick-ass action. I think i’ve made my point already.

But what if you were given a choice (wait, this is not actually a choice), that you should take part in a scary movie. That you decide on how you’ll die.

I know the idea is pretty and plain stupid. So, what’s my point of us thinking about this kind of idea? Now, wait a minute, I think we know this certain site with a death counter. I believed I tried it and it informed me that I’d die in the year 2036 with some gruesome stupid death like kissing Britney Spears or what-ev.

But who wants to read something that you’d probably die by sleeping.

And who wants to die? Or who is ready to die? (you’d probably stop reading by now)

So, going back to my crap, I’d probably want to die in Jigsaw’s murders. I was thinking of dying with the following movie themes: House of Wax, Hostel, Nightmare on Elm Street, Scream, and some movies that I really want to mention but I can’t seem to remember them right now.

I know that the pain is there but the idea of you dying while you’re trying to save your life is kind of awesome.

Think survival. Think thinking of your own life for a change.

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Hahaha. This is like a black comedy blogging. I’d probably post something that how you want your friend killed.

Meyn… too gory and sick. This might be the last time I’d post something so sick.

Bwahahaha.

--=+=--

Sorry, big intake of scary movies kicking in. (and at the same time I’m watching Salem’s Lot or as my officemate states Salem Slut)

Of some individual rumblings.

I’m not a mainstream type of person. As much as possible I don’t want to go with the flow. I don’t want to be typecast-ed too. I just want to be simple and unique. But sometimes we have to go with the bandwagon, with the mainstream, with the fad. Or else it will be hard for us to fit in a group, a crowd or strangers that you really don’t know but you have to make a conversation.

You must be at least informed with a lot of subjects. There’s current events, religion, political views, music, entertainment, sex (of course you wouldn’t converse to a stranger about sex. That is so uber-ly weird and pervertious unless if you’re talking with Asia Agcaoili then you might make a connection… or Madame Auring), sports, education, and the most usual subject of health.

As I’ve mentioned, I stay away from mainstream stuff. The hard thing is it will always be there and you can’t escape it. Think Scotty Doesn’t Know of the movie Euro Trip. We can’t escape these things.

Usually, mainstream pertains to music (kaya nga may mainstream music e. adeek. But that’s another story). When F4’s music started to rise, I liked it at first (bwahaha) but I turned away when it was having its mainstream fame. When a rock band, Incubus, swept our feet with Drive it was ok, then every college student (especially gerls. Yak. Bwahaha) liked Incubus; I turned away with a heavy heart.

Though I still do and listen to mainstream stuff. Up until now I’m the number one fan of Backstreet Boys and Spice Girls. Even if they are not boys and girls anymore, I still like (read: not love. I call their songs cringe videoke songs) to listen to their songs once in a while especially All I Have To Give and 2 Become 1. Having this kind of revelation, if you don’t want to be my friend anymore, it’s fine.

Now, there’s an emerging type of mainstream that is bursting out of my mind. It is called P.I. mainstream. It is plainly simple. If you’re aware with the song Umbrella and you catch a hymn or two from the song whether it’s the ballad, rock, or Tagalog version, I can’t stop myself in saying “P.I. Umbrella na naman????”

Speaking of mainstream clothing, there are rules too with the men’s underwear. Cotton briefs are considered mainstream. Boxers are not so mainstream (and it is not really common for us Filipino men because our mothers don’t buy them). Torn and wrinkled are considered mainstream too. I’m not sure if Bikini briefs or T-backs (pordyosporsanto) are mainstream, I still have to extend my research regarding this one.

Now, if you’re wearing colored briefs especially pink in color then congratulations. You are unique and you’re not part of the mainstream.

Hay. I’m going to watch Salem’s Lot na lang…

Of some corny reality.

There’s this show named The Biggest Loser. The object of that reality show is to let these fat bastards (oops. Hahaha. Sorry for the term) get thin on national television. The drama of getting thin, that’s probably the concept of that show. The creator’s of the show are probably that smart. U.S. having one of the countries in the world with the most obese people, this is probably a good idea that they thought of. This is a very degrading show, isn’t it? From the show’s title to the part when they contestants go loco to being healthy and thin. Now, what if you didn’t achieve your goal?

You’d probably end up in the gag reel. “Like this guy tried three months of exercising, not eating fatty foods, and more exercising. He got two kilo’s burned and that’s it. What a fat bastard. Bwahahaha”. And they’d probably show your shame over and over again on national television. They’d probably give you prices such as x-deals of donuts, burgers, and fat-giving products. Talk about adding insult to injury.

Why can’t we have shows entitled The Sexiest Bastard? Take me for instance, I’m semi-malnourished. All they have to do is to help me the proper BMI (it’s not related to a bicycle brand, it’s Body Mush Index. It’s the total mush you have stored in your body) in probably six months. They’ll feed me, give me free medical care, won’t let me worry about any financial problems, and that’s it. I’d probably show some drama like “Oh my God, the twister fries is still not out yet!” or “What happened to my favorite couple, Ryan and Juday? Why O Why?” or “Woo-hoo! Backstreet Boys is finally having their reunion concert in the Philippines!”

Since we’ve been living in these bad drama tv situations, they might as well produce the show that I am offering.

Imagine, free crap for six months. I’d like to take that crap anytime.

Of course, there’ll be obstacles too. Like, who can watch the most hours of Seventh Heaven or playing Jenga or using a clicker in a mall.

Now, that’s nice. (Hahaha! The Next Best Slob).

Then, we pitch another reality-base television show. Post-pregnant women who gets back their original weight eating only Malunggay-based food. This might be a cool show as all contestants might look bungal all through-out the show’s season.

And no breastfeeding scenes. Please. Let’s keep this show child friendly.

Or a whore show who gets the most customers in one month.

Man, it’s like I’m a reality show idea machine here…

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“Dreaming to star in his own reality show… The next Bagets Star”

Nah.

Of emoticon's nick.

Black shoes, black socks, black shirt, black jacket, black eyeliner, black fingernails, and a hair that looks exactly like Dao Ming Hsu but a little shorter.

That’s my idea of an emo. I once saw them when Red Horse had a concert near our village. I’m not entirely sure if there were “famous” bands that played during that time but seeing people (when I say people as in hordes) having the emo-do made me scared of the idea of an emo army. Think some late nineties or early 2000 movie where high school teens were made zombies… awww, you get the idea.

I was just trying to analyze things on why they sport this look (and live a life like an emo). If you’re a kid during these times then maybe (just maybe) you’re a material child. Toys, computers, etc. You only get those things. Maybe, your parents are too busy with their work that they’re forgetting about you. I’ve posted something about this already so it’s not much use if I do some post about this again.

Now, as I’ve said emo-ing can be somehow related to music. A big factor of this is that guy in My Chemical Romance and then followed up by that lead singer of Chicosci and probably a hundred and one bands that is sporting this awesome (crap) look.

Let me see, an emo song is angst-ridden song that is supposedly loud but if you read the lyrics you may just say, “Oh my God, daig pa si Vilma at si Nora sa drama ng kanta”. Hey, just listen to MCR and you’d probably feel that emo-sense (think spider-sense).

So, if all emo-ism is usually from music then I’m getting scared right now. There are early emo bands that didn’t have that emo look but emo songs are what they cater to the music lover.

Since I’m not a Panic fan (and I surely hate, wait uberly hate MCR), I like Fall Out Boy. Then there’s Dashboard Confessional, Jimmy Ear World, New Found Glory, Paramore, The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus, Silverstein, The Starting Line, Story Of The Year, and Weezer (nooo!!!! Wiki didn’t just set Weezer into Emo!!). And probably Yellowcard too.

Metallica is releasing an album thank God.

Now, I do hope this is just a fad.

--=+=--

And I’d probably drop by the E-heads concert. Have you learned of that sudden great news? Sweet. Philip Morris pulled out because DOH said no.

Please. No emo in the concert. We just need some angry-rock’ed E-heads fans (bwahahaha… angry all these years. Tagal kasing mag-reunion e)

Of a day before Domingo.

I recently just watched TGIS the movie (it was like just a few days ago mind you). Remember those days when we stay home in a sunny Saturday afternoon waiting for that crappy Coney Reyes on Camera and readied ourselves through the na-na-na na-na-na of this show. (Obviously you won’t understand me if you’re a Gimik fan. Gimik sucks in all ways but not Mylene Dizon. Definitely not Mylene Dizon. She will marry me someday.)

Isn’t it wise for television producers to come up with a show whose most of the cast are remotely unknown? I believe the only “celebrity” in TGIS is Angelu De Leon. She came from that Ang Tv show but she wasn’t really that sikat yet. Oh, I think she was sikat as Muning in Ober Da Bakod. Fine, I really don’t remember on which is which or who is who. So, please forgive me if I can’t really give the facts. If you can’t forgive me I’ll just do my Sandler-ish angry mode. Nah…

The show’s storyline is actually simple. Take these kids who live in a “rich” neighborhood (define rich. Not Richie Rich rich though. I don’t how rich it is, I’m not in the mood for any debates right now. Bwahahaha), mix it with one guy who is not as affluent as the rest of the gang (and make him the comedic relief) and look for issues that will cater today’s generation.

And that’s it. Maybe, adding some cool songs made it all differ. C’mon, this was the show where I first heard of Dyslexic Heart, Best Things in Life are Free, and the wonderful, wonderful song and dance sequence of Choo-choo Train.

Let me see… the cast. There’s the sweet smilin’ Angelu De Leon, the teenage angst ridden Bobby Andrews, the pretty Raven Villanueva, the dancing Michael Flores, the “funnyman” Red Sternberg, the I-can’t-think-of-any-adjective Rica Peralejo, and the non-acting JM Bondoc (yes, he really doesn’t know how to act. Up until now JM does not know how to act. Baron Geisler has won an award already and where is JM?)

So, maybe that’s it. Casting ordinary guys and gals from out of nowhere and making them look cool. That’s it. And we viewers were able to feel that we can we be one of them (or that’s what was running on our minds all along). Or we were able to experience what they were experiencing. Except JM’s character, I haven’t found a chick-boy who doesn’t know how to act. Please!!!! I love you JM!

And I remembered their last episode. Giving me a sense of dictionary-ism. I wont’ forget the words of Joaquin Torres III, “ostracize”.

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This post is stupid. Really. Next time, the science of Tabing Ilog. Bwahahaha!

I swear, after doing this crap. I felt that I lost an hour of my life. Adding up the hours of watching this show, meyn, that’s like losing a year of my life.

*boring*

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Watched Dobol Trobol earlier. Vic is using the same formula. It might be crappy or lame but I'd rather spend some moolah for this instead of watching Torotot.

Of Earth's sportsfest.

Wow. The olympics; a prestigious competition being competed by all (almost) the nations of Earth (did I just say nations of Earth? Hahaha. I sound like a martian). It surely is a great honour if you take part in this event. Ask my lola, it’s true.

Every four years, we have the same shitty expectation… we won’t win anything.

There are a lot of reasons why we suck at the Olympics. One of the reasons is our system. The government doesn’t really help our athletes. These officials just ride with the flow and they get moolah that ain’t even theirs. I mean have you heard the gossip of the politicians who enter their manok instead of the athletes that really deserve to play in the event? Well, that’s us.

We just need a super uber major reform. How about these corrupt officials do a major resignation and leave it to the newer breed of our generation who still care about our nation. (I do hope that the Japanese have instilled their idea of Hara-kiri for the shameful Filipinos who creates problem to our country. Asa pa tayo, we are still in the survival of the fittest stage.)

But that’s not all; we also have the problem of subjective judges in the Olympics. We can only get gold if the event or competition that we join is so obvious for our win. It will be hard for us to win in one-on-one matches given our dismal losses in Tae Kwon Do and Boxing. I may be subjective here but c’mon, it is as if the Olympics are just like the Triwizard Tournament. Cheating is a necessity.

Yuck. Serious post?

So, here’s a suggestion. I’m not sure if the Vatican City joined this year’s Olympics. It would be nice if the priests of the Vatican City be trained as judges for events that need to be upgraded in terms of judging.

Think about it, we’re around ninety percent sure that cheating will be not as much as before. Things would be fairer for all countries whether you’re part of the G8 or if you’re a third world. Hoping though that these priest judges won’t wear robes ala old school monks as they might look like Voldie’s cohorts.

I still just can’t believe that Bahrain and Afghanistan have won their first (?) gold medals and here we are happy with two-digit places. We are happy that we were able to beat our own mark and that’s it.

I believe this is a great dream for all of us Filipinos, a gold medal. But when will we get this? Only time will tell.

For the meantime, let’s listen and watch Moymoy Palaboy et al strut their stuff in Youtube and Bubble Gang.

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Must… think… happy… thoughts…

--=+=--

This sounds like a bitter post. Should I just listen to Bitter Off Alone by Alice Deejay?

I think I got some happy thoughts again.

Of some uninformative stuff.

Deedja know that the TV series Are You Afraid of the Dark wasn’t shot in Bulacan. Just because they used sparklers during the opening sequence of each episode doesn’t mean that they pulverized those Bulacan sparklers. They were exported from Bulacan.

Deedja know that the Devil’s cake is really made by the devil. The Angel cake is made by the devil too. That’s why the term sinful sweetness is coined. Limbo cake is still in the works though.

Deedja know that Emilio Aguinaldo is not our first president. Victor Sugod is our first president. He was accidentally killed by one of Aguinaldo’s men. Andres Bonifacio didn’t know about this instead he was informed that the Spanish killed Victor. Also, Victor is Andres’ brother. Andres’ real name is Andres Sugod but during those days pseudonyms were often used by known people, he changed his surname to Bonifacio. Remember the battle-cry “Sugod, mga kapatid!” It was originally termed as “Sugod, aking kapatid!” It was an act of vengeance for Andres’ part.

Deedja know that Linda Blair created an underground sequel for the movie The Exorcist. It was banned in a lot of countries due to the fact that they used the same scenes and sequences as the said original movie (oo, yung The Exorcist nga). It was entitled The Sexorcist.

Deedja know that Hasbro contacted the Marcoses for the Mickey Mouse money. It was of this time that the currency was useless in the Philippines and Hasbro went into recycling and environment stuff. A spy from Disney informed their executives and called in their lawyers that the Mickey Mouse money should just stay within the Philippines as they showed a contract stating that the currency cannot leave the country. Hasbro didn’t want to mix up with the mess and decided not to pursue with this instead.

Deedja know that the Eraserheads originally rendered their version of Father and Son’s Miss Na Miss Kita during the nineties. The band then informed their label that they are not going to release the single during that time. They’re planning to release it on the E-head’s Twentieth anniversary. Since the Heads’ broke up earlier the single was placed in a time capsule instead. It will be shown in public a century after.

Deedja know that Goosebumps wasn’t shot in Pandacan. Despite its obvious name the Pandacan constituents always argued that balut came from ducks.

Deedja know that the phrase Ingat Ka is really a curse. As we are fond of saying this to our friends or loved ones when we’re saying our goodbyes, we shouldn’t. The K’balon (one of our ancestral races that went extinct just before the turn of the 15^th century. They went berserk with an unknown liquid during that time. It was later found out that the liquid that caused their berserk-ness are the beverage called beer) used the phrase both as a battle-cry and as a curse (the K’balon has some witchcraft powers. As of the moment there is still no hard evidence whether the K’balon really had those powers) to their enemies. The phrase Ingat Ka came from the word Inggatkuh.

Deedja know that the cutix used by women has a positive effect with their sexuality. Scientists found out that cutix plus estrogen can give out a certain endorphin aroma that can make men crazy. Have you ever seen a guy who uses cutix make other guys crazy? Oh, I know you know the answer for this one.

Of some stupid post that shoud've been posted yesterday.

I’m always amazed with nicknames. There are really awesome nicknames in the NBA. There’s Michael ‘His Airness’ Jordan, Julius ‘Dr. J’ Erving, Damon ‘Mighty Mouse’ Stoudamire, and Hakeem ‘The Dream’ Olajuwon. I mean somehow the nicknames have a yabang effect. Right? Given the Airness nick. It gives us the effect that this person can fly somehow. Or Dr. J. Imagine, you’re a basketball player and you’re a doctor at the same time. Imagine the help that basketball players can get if all of them had doctorate degrees. Basketball can be made as an uber-safe sport. Safer than chess players (simple. I haven’t heard an astig nickname for the chess players. Or I haven’t heard distinct nicks for them. I only hear the same nick, Grandmaster.)

Now, I don’t want to check this out in wiki, I can’t seem to understand why P. Diddy had the nick Puffy. The last time I heard, puffy are fishes that they get big when they are in an argumentative state, see Spongebob’s driving teacher.

He’s a hip-hop star and you should have that edge. Right? The yabang edge. And your nick states Puffy. I believe the nick Puffy should be given to his dead rapper friend (ooohhh, I forgot the name. He sang Mo’ Money, Mo’ Problems. He’s not Fat Joe.)

Thank God he changed it to P. Diddy. Deriving it probably from Jennifer Lopez’s nick.

Oh, and I don’t like Sean Combs much.

Speaking of nicks, why can’t we have our own angas nicks within our names? I glanced back at my life and found the days when all of us had different nicknames. I’m sure you had one when you were in high school.

I tried thinking of any angas nicks my classmates had in high school and this is all I came up with:

D. ‘quack quack’ M. à quack is derived from Doylet Duck the bowl cleaner.

E. ‘kabayo’ C. à I can’t remember why he was called kabayo. We referred to him as epal.

W. ‘dubai’ Bernardo à I think his plan is to go to dubai.

M. ‘eh?’ Villanueva à from Andrew E’s E. From E to Eh.

And of course they called me antukin. For obvious reasons, I slept a lot when I was uhm… up until now.

Hhmm. This doesn’t sound a good idea (sinabi mo pa. Sana hindi mo na lang to sinulat! Bwahahaha). High school nicks are greatly demoralizing.

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And another trailer...

It had been years since episode three had been shown in cinemas. George Lucas is short

on budget but he has a ready script for the connecting story of Attack of the Clones and

Revenge of the Sith. Since he was short on budget, he was still able to cast some famous

people for the next Star Wars movie.

Bozo as Obi Wan Kenobi.

Yoyo of Boyoyong as Anakin Skywalker.

Xuxa as Queen Amidala.

"Star Wars: Clown Wars"

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Getting suckier by the moment… One of those juvenile posts… But come to think of it Bob Ong made this type of effective. Remember his early books about the teachers and such (wala lang). I think we all have this attempt to turn back time and hoping that we could change some things we’ve done in high school or college or when we were still young.

Or maybe, we just want to reminisce of all those stupid things that happened to us that we’re all wishing that I did hope I didn’t fully forget my happy younger years. Oh, life during the nineties is good. Really.

Bwahahaha. I’m getting nostalgic na.

Of some ringtones.

The fad for ringtones has surpassed it’s hey day(s). Gone were the days when you’ll check your friend’s cell phone regarding his/her new ringtone. Or spend sometime in the Internet (or wherever) looking for that perfect ringtone for your cell phone.

Technology could’ve affected everything. Monotones changed into prophylaxis este polytones and then into MP3’s. I really don’t know what will happen next but a ‘nangangalabit na cellphone’ instead of a ringtone with vibrate is quite of endearing (bwahahaha, endearing you say).

Nowadays, we often hear the gasgas tunes such as Bubbly by Colbita Colley =), the Soulja Boy theme (I don’t think I’m hearing this crap anymore), and that blue fur-balled creature ‘ Mahiiiiiwaaagggaaannnggg Mennsssaaahhheee’ (God help us). Of course, there’s you usual ‘personal touched’ ringtone such as those made by your child ‘I love you mama!’ or some crappy I love you from your loved one (is therrre a bitterrrrness herrrree boy? Arrrrr).

How about us reliving the power of ringtones? I have some few suggestions here that could matter (matter naman ngayon. Kanina endearing. Anong matter gusto mo? Plasma or ma-ma-matter girl by madowna.)

We can start with words of wisdom from Nicole Hiyala. Her soothing voice will surely grab your attention and surely, you’ll answer your phone in an instant. How about setting your ringtone to one of the radio stations that is usually ‘channeled’ in the Fx that you’re in. There’s an excuse for this though, you can always say ‘I’m being one with the Fx’. Whatever that means.

We can use some words from television and the internet such as ‘Sinong nanay mo?’, ‘Saranghamida bo’, and my favorite of all favorites ‘Waaaaalllllaaannngggg Tuuuullluugggaann!!!’ (you now have a right to blurt out the corniest joke that you can think of, “May baon ako…”)

Sounds made by your body are also a good addition for this one. You can create your own; just make sure that you have the audio record option in your cellphone. A fart, cough, or that famous armpit fart can easily be recorded in your phone and every time your phone rings, you can always make yabang ‘aaahhh… kaya nyo yan?”

Scary ringtones are cool too. You can use your scariest voice and record the following: Papatayin ko ang nanay mo, ang tatay mo, ang lola mo, ang lolo mo, ang kapatid mong babae, ang kapatid mong lalaki, ang pinsan mo, ang tita mo, ang tito mo, ang teacher mo, ang labandera mo, ang friend mo, ang friend ng friend mo, ang friend ng friend ng friend mo, ang employer mo… etc. etc. Hey, you’re old enough to fill in the missing pieces.

We can also add some political jokes such as ‘The SONA is a success. The SONA is a SUCCESS!!!!’

Lastly, we can do our very own Adam Sandler impersonation. You can try a sillier style. ‘Knock! Knock!... Knock Knock!!... Knock Knock!!!... Knock Knock!!!!... KNNNOOOCCCKK!!!! KNOOCCCCCKKK!!! (insert breathing heavily here)’

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Boo! Hoe-hummed. (wala ka nang masulat noh?)

Of i've gone back in 1982.

Aren't we tired of that same old BS formula for our bubblegum movies (as Psychocow would say, bubblegum movies are our tried and tested romantic comedies which spawned great loveteams such as Jolina and Marvin, John Lloyd and Sarah, and Madam Auring and that sixteen-year-old person (he's probably in his 20's right now. how time flies).

Here is the simple formula. Create small plot twists and make it big. It turns out with the first 70 percent of the film having goody goody laughs and then the turning point plot twist comes in then for around 20 percent there's drama then the solution after the drama. And basically and usually that's it.

The main point of the movie is to make you laugh and to make you cry somehow. If you don't shed tears then the movie is a bomb (or for guys who don't want to admit that they had tears in their eyes, "napuwing lang ako". yeah, napuwing sa aircon).

Wouldn't it be nice if we change the last thirty percent of the movie? For us, when we say romantic comedies we end up with romantic comedy slash tearjerking minor drama you-crappy-pr-consultants-you-didn't-inform-us-guys-that-we-will-cry.

Here's a suggestion, as i've already mentioned, for that last thirty percent. Why don't we kill the leading man or lady with a knife or something sharp such as an icepick or a haba-haba ballpen. There should, of course, be tons of blood and guts involved. One of the protagonists should turn out to be the antagonist and that is a great plot twist (we can add some cannibalistic plot but we want it to be PG-13, don't we?)

Now, that is a real plot twist. But wait there's more...

The antagonist then would be surprised that the protagonist will still be alive. The protagonist will heal all his/her wounds and then kisses the antagonist. For which, we are expecting a happy ever after story (or as they say, end credits. who said that? I really don't know.)

But, but wait there's more.

The antagonist calls Wally and Jose and they'll act as the X-files slash version. And then we let the credits roll.

Now, that's good plot twisting. We now have our very own Pinoy romance comedy slash sci-fi-mystery-thriller-suspense movie.

And we can still call it a bubblegum movie.

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If the cast includes Michael V, Ogie Alcasid, Rufa Mae Quinto, Antonio Aquintana, et al then we can call it…

C’mon. You know the punchline. =)

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This is a synopsis I got in IMDB, “A rookie Australian journalist, covering the Indonesian civil war of 1965, must choose between romance and the story that will make his career.”

So, what the hell is that? Well, it is a movie by Mel Gibson and Sigourney Weaver.

So, is it special? Not much. Same war-stricken country movie or what-not.

So, what’s the title of the movie? The Year of Living Dangerously.

So, some parts of it were filmed in? The Philippines of course.

Watching a hair-semifull Bembol Roco and a young Mel Gibson is so sweet. I wanna watch this again. TCM is the channel pips.

Of a li-bru.

I’m always amazed by our Kababayan’s kalakal especially by those vendors selling in a bus. Almost everything is sold. From peanuts to cashew to quail eggs to whatnot. There was even a time when they give free taste tests but it went passé. Maybe because some of the riding public felt some disturbing feeling inside (just maybe the food that they were giving weren’t that edible anymore).

I remember when I was young; I usually buy those orange jellies something. I really loved ‘em.

But they usually sell edible stuff. It is always edible stuff. Let’s say your bus ride is six hours long (sample is a Manila to Baguio trip). A six hour trip is no joke. In the course of the trip, sometimes you just want to stop talking to your seatmate and do stuff by yourself. What if before the bus leave the station:

Vendor 1: “Ruling, Ruling kayo dyan. Meron sek and seben dito. May prins tsaka halos. Ruling, Ruling kayo dyan. May beteldabar na din. May bran din ako dito. Dyabintsi meron! Ruling, Bran. Bili na kayo!!!”

Vendor 2: “Tepenking. Kumpleto ako. May tawer, et, mesari, at kung anu-ano pa…”

Wouldn’t it be nice if these vendors sell books too? I know it’s a bit woah. Just think about it. You brought a book and you didn’t notice that there are only fifty pages left. Those fifty pages will consume you in less than thirty minutes. What should you do? Given that every one you know of is asleep. You are wide awake. It is extremely dark outside (maybe its night time). Your ipod ran out of batteries. (Is this really possible?)

(Is this one of my stupid ideas? Oh yes it is.)

It will be delightful to hear when the vendors add this to their spiel.

Vendor 1: “Hardban. Hardban lahat ng binebenta ko.”

Buyer: “Patingin nga nyang mga binebenta mo. Aba, hardbound nga lahat a. May ibang titles ka pa ba? Patingin na din.”

Vendor goes to his stock and goes back to the buyer with the heavy goods.

Vendor 1: “Eto na po.”

Buyer: “Meron pa bang iba?”

Vendor 1: “Check ko lang po sa baba.”

Vendor checks goods and brings the new set of hardbound books back to the buyer.

Buyer: “Hhhmm… Wala kayo nung ______? Mukhang wala yata nung gusto ko. Meron pa ba sa baba?”

Vendor 1: “Ay yan lang po. Naubos na po kasi yung ibang titles e. Baka nabenta na yung mga gusto nyo. Bukas pa kasi ho mareplenish to.”

Buyer: “Ay ganun. Sya, wag na lang.”

I think I found out why this is not feasible.

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What song of Paramore states a guy who likes a lot of girls?

Crushcrushcrush.

Oh meyn. Hehehe.

Of a wuss and that's me.

I guess one of my pet peeves when I go home from work is when there are two (or more) individuals who talk and talk and talk. Don’t get me wrong; I’m guilty with this one too. I tend to talk loudly too just like them. But it is really not nice when you listen to this kind of conversation…

Woman 1: “Alam mo nung nanganak ako noon wala din ako halos naramdaman e. Kahit caesarian yung panganganak ko.”

Woman 2: “Ako din e. Sa kin naman tinali pa nga yung mga kamay ko nung nanganganak ako.” (huu… hardcore!)

Woman 1: “Bale yung sa kin kasi talagang tinest nila yung anesthesia kung gumana. Bale itututok ka nung injection at tatanungin kung masakit pa hanggang mawala.”

Woman 2: “Talaga?”
Woman 1: “Oo, tapos noon. Pag medyo ok na, e since nga na caesarian ako, naramdaman kong hinihiwa yung tyan ko. Hindi naman sya masakit pero talagang mararamdaman mo yung hinihiwa ka.”

Woman 2: “Hindi ka natulog?”
Woman 1: “Hindi e. Tapos nun, may mga tumatapon na dugo pero hindi naman ganun kadami. Ganun yata yun pag na-caesarian ka. Hindi ganun kadami yung dugo.”

And they were hanging with this subject until I got home. God, am I a bad person?

All the women reading this are probably laughing your ass off regarding on how I felt with the situation. You can’t blame me though. I haven’t been in an operating room (where I was the one watching the operation). I’m still in the stage wherein I am overcoming my phobia for syringes (or syringiaphobia).

Would you like us men to talk like this…

Man 1: “Chongtoldood, grabe talaga nung tinuli ako. Ibang klase yung nangyari sa kin sa ospital noon.”

Man 2: “Talaga doodtolchong?”

Man 1: “Oo, sabi kasi nung doktor noon, hindi pa daw ready yung akin, pero since nandun na nga ako. Sabi na lang nya. Kaya yan! Aja!”

Man 2: “O anong nangyari?”

Man 1: “Yun nga, e diba pag hindi pa naibababa yung taas pipilitin yun? Syempre medyo masakit na yun. Pero panalo yung ibang sakit na naramdaman ko. Yung injection. Sagad-sagaran. Naka anim na bote yata si dok bago mawala yung sakit e. Tapos yun, tinanong ko nga yung doktor kung pwede akong sumigaw, sabi nya ok lang. Ayun, sumigaw ako. Nagpuntahan tuloy yung mga nurse. Nakakahiya pare. Pero ok lang. Astig na ko ngayon.”

Man 2: “Aaaah. Sa probinsya kasi ako nun e. Mas nakakatakot lang sa min, kasi diba de-bayabas lang yun? Tapos sabay taga? E paano kung maputol? Bad trip yun diba. At least sa yo, hinimay ng maayos nung doktor yung ano mo.”

Man 1: “Gusto mong makita yung finished product?”
Man 2: “Sige… patingin. Para malamang ko lang kung maganda yung cut nung sa kin.”

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I’m not going to bring up any more Machine Girl topics. I think karma chameleon is knocking at my door.

I should probably change it to Cannibal Holocaust.

Hardcore.

Of the girl next door.

Got this from an email forward. There are 7 other pictures just like these. I can only ask the question, "why?". Does she look like Hilary Duff? A Pinoy Hilary Duff probably?

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So, I guess I have to join the bandwagon too. I only have some few pictures to share though.

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I think i'm bored...